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Stupid Security
Portions of Stupid Security are copyright 2003 by Nat Howard and his licensors.

 
We'll decide who the terrorists are, thank you
posted by nrh on Saturday January 03, @01:00PM
News Anonymous Coward writes "AirTran Airways apologized Friday to members of a Muslim family for kicking them off a plane and refusing to rebook them despite requests from FBI agents who had cleared them of wrongdoing."

Thanks, AC!

It sounds, actually, like the forces of Reason my triumph here, ultimately -- hopefully the lower-level AirTran employee who screwed up will not make *that* mistake again.

I'm amazed that the FBI's word on this matter wouldn't be accepted by AirTran. How paranoid do you have to be, exactly, before your assertion that someone is innocent and safe is accepted by the airlines?

( Read More... )



Wrong Guy Wearing the Clown Suit
posted by nrh on Monday December 22, @01:23AM
News THE Anonymous Coward writes "A clown with plastic handcuffs from a toy store is strip searched by airport security after his pantaloons set off the metal detector. (That's right, pantaloons.) Oh, and they confiscated his plastic handcuffs because they were deemed a "risk"...yet the plastic scissors were allowed on board.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1099322/PC -Konk-clown-strip-searched-airport-security-guards --thought-terrorist.html"

Thanks AC! This story has simply too many chances for ironic tag-lines, so I'll leave them for others to make.

( Read More... )



Sikh Musicians Thrown Off US Airways Flight
posted by nrh on Friday November 28, @12:12PM
News Anonymous Coward writes "Three Sikh musicians were ordered off a US Airways flight when its pilot refused the fly with them onboard. A US Airways spokesman mumbled "potential security concerns" as their pathetic excuse. http://www.mercurynews.com/breakingnews/ci_1108813 9"

Thanks, AC! Without an articulated reason for stopping these folks, one might reasonably assume it was some combination of prejudice and ignorance. Certainly if I were one of the musicians, I wouldn't be satisfied with this explanation.

This might be another example of fear begetting anger. I sure hope the musicians got a nice apology, but if the article says so, I missed it. It'll be interesting to see where their filed complaints go. My guess? No particular answer -- some kind of bureaucratic reflex-response, but no responsible human being saying "golly, you were right. We're changing this, and we're sorry."

( Read More... )



Wishing you a Happy Recombobulation in this Holiday Season
posted by nrh on Thursday November 27, @04:39PM
Humor A friend sent in This story about a "recombobulation area" in an airport -- you know, after they make you take off your shoes, unpack your laptop, show them your undies.. whatever.. a place to put yourself back together.

I decry the discombobulation, but concede that "recombobulation" area helps!

( Read More... )



When The Rules Are More Important Than Common Sense
posted by nrh on Wednesday November 12, @06:51PM
News Peter Baker writes "How about this story reported by the New Zealand Herald. http://www.nzherald.co.nz/opinion/news/article.cfm ?c_id=466&objectid=10509462 "My brother-in-law went through security at Auckland domestic airport and witnessed a passenger having to fish out her nail scissors from her handbag and leave them behind. He went through security and then boarded his plane. After being seated he could smell petrol. He knew you shouldn't be able to smell petrol on a plane, because planes don't use petrol. The smell got worse and eventually he got the attention of one of the flight attendants. They started to look around to see where it was coming from. They found in the overhead compartment a chainsaw in a bag that was leaking petrol into the compartment. His plane was delayed as the owner was identified and the chainsaw removed and put with the main luggage. The owner of the chainsaw said security had stopped him but had let him through because it wasn't one of the things on their list to confiscate.""

I travelled by air in New Zealand about a year ago, and I must say, I was pleasantly suprpised by how informal and relaxed it was. Apparently rules have tightened. A *leaky* chainsaw shouldn't have been allowed of course, but why not allow a clean one? It would be hard to imagine a harder-to-conceal weapon, or one more conspicuous when you're trying to start it up.

I can see hear the somewhat inarticulate complaints of our Zombie readers now....

( Read More... )



Remember How All Those Cameras Are Supposed To Help?
posted by nrh on Thursday October 30, @10:02PM
News Brightly colored pancho with hood and sunglasses: $4.50 at goodwill
Balloons filled with helium: another $3.00 from a street vendor
Defeating an enormously expensive surveillance infrastructure so that you can plant a bomb: priceless.

As the person who sent this to me put it: "Soon, only the terrorists will have balloons".

( Read More... )



Mainstream Coverage of Security Theater
posted by nrh on Saturday October 18, @04:13PM
News The Atlantic is running a story called The Things He Carried about the distinction between "security theater" and "security" and the TSA.

I must say, in defense of TSA, they didn't try to confiscate the somewhat provocative T-shirts the reporter wore!

It's worth a look and a couple of hoots!

( Read More... )



Four wheels: Good. Two wheels: Terrorist Suspect
posted by nrh on Monday October 13, @07:48AM
News Anonymous Coward writes "Another one from Aero-News Network: http://www.aero-news.net/index.cfm?ContentBlockID= 99bcabbc-a8e3-4c82-be91-672cf6dc9f2d&

An FAA technician at Boston's Logan International Airport decided that rather than take an airport vehicle to get to a runway light maintenance area, he would rather ride a bike. Unfortunately, in these uncertain times, anything out of the ordinary will trigger a security scare, and that's exactly what happened - State police were called in, and a runway was closed for 20 minutes, delaying 5 flights."

Thanks, AC!

( Read More... )



Protestor = Terrorist
posted by nrh on Wednesday October 08, @05:58AM
News Anonymous Coward writes "In perhaps the starkest demonstration yet of abuse of the power to label people as terrorists, the Maryland State Police classified 53 nonviolent activists as terrorists and entered their names and personal information into state and federal databases that track terrorism suspects. The official who authorized the gathering of information on members of groups such as those opposed to the death penalty called them "fringe groups".

One well-known antiwar activist from Baltimore, Max Obuszewski, was singled out in the intelligence logs released by the ACLU, which described a "primary crime" of "terrorism-anti-government" and a "secondary crime" of "terrorism-anti-war protesters."

There you have it: disagree with the government, and you've committed a primary crime of being a terrorist. Can it get any more blatant?"

Thanks, AC! I confidently await the term "terrorism" being used to describe a parking violation.

( Read More... )



Country Singer Drops Drawers At TSA Checkpoint
posted by nrh on Friday October 03, @09:52PM
News Anonymous Coward writes "Yet more compelling reading from Aero-News Network: http://www.aero-news.net/index.cfm?ContentBlockID= b2c8d2e6-e322-4543-830e-d8eeaaae8687

I'm not sure if this story qualifies as "Stupid Security" or "Bizarre Security". Anyway, it tells of a traveler at a TSA checkpoint, who mistook an instruction from screener, and uhhhh... well, he removed his trousers in front of the the TSA staff and other travelers in line. For some reason, this caused a panic amongst the screeners. As the "suspect" describes it: "People started yelling. It was a huge scene. Police were running through the airport, and TSA officers were running toward me and I'm like, 'What?'""

The same thing happens to me every time I drop my drawers at a TSA checkpoint!

( Read More... )



 
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